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Counseling Isn't for Me

Or is it? Many people have preconceived ideas about counseling, but hundreds of thousands of people from all walks of life have successfully received assistance from a counselor at some point in their lives. Life is full of challenges, including pressures at work, financial worries, family problems, and personal issues. Even with support from family and friends, it can sometimes be helpful to talk with an independent counselor who can help you work out what's right for you, in an empathic and confidential setting. Here are some of the common myths surrounding counseling.

Myth: Counseling is only for people with serious mental health issues.

Reality: Not true! Many people attend counseling when they come to a point in their lives when nothing seems to be seriously wrong, but they don't know which way to turn next. Some people access counseling when simply struggling with a specific situation or problem in their life. Others use it as a means of personal or professional development.

Myth: Only weak people who can't cope with life seek counseling.

Reality: The opposite is actually true! Sometimes life throws you a curveball that you can find difficult to manage on your own. It takes inner strength to acknowledge that there is something that you could benefit from addressing in counseling. It takes self-awareness to recognize this and courage to be willing to proactively deal with the challenges you are facing.

Myth: Counseling is only for serious problems.

Reality: While counseling can help people facing serious issues, most people who access counseling through their employee assistance program (EAP) do so for assistance with everyday issues, such as stress, anxiety, or work-life balance. You don't have to wait until things spiral out of control before seeking support; counseling can help nip things in the bud before things become too serious.

Myth: How can a stranger possibly help?

Reality: Discussing your concerns with an impartial professional is one of the reasons that counseling is so effective. Counselors have the training and skills to provide you with unbiased insights and support, which may help you speak more openly about your situation without fear of being judged or criticized. This can then free you up to make the decision that's right for you. Counseling can often give you a fresh perspective, which can be extremely motivating.

Myth: Counselors just sit there and never say anything.

Reality: This is a stereotypical depiction of counseling and is far from the reality. Counselors are proactive and engaged in a two-way process to help you focus on what you want to achieve.

Myth: Counseling just goes on and on.

Reality: The counseling offered through your EAP is based on a short-term, focused model. This enables you to discuss the problems you're facing, set a goal or focus to give you direction, and develop strategies and skills to improve your current situation. Counseling sessions last around 50 minutes and are generally on a weekly basis until you have attended the agreed number of sessions required to achieve your goal or focus.

Myth: Everyone at work will know I'm seeing a counselor.

Reality: The only person who will know you are seeing a counselor is you. No one at your workplace will even know that you have accessed your EAP unless you tell them. Your counselors are bound by a code of ethics and work within their confidentiality guidelines, which your EAP strictly adheres to. This would be explained to you fully when you contact the service and prior to your starting any counseling.

Myth: A counselor will fix my problems for me.

Reality: A counselor will work with you to help you work through the challenges you face, but their role isn't to fix things or do it for you. The counselor will listen, guide, support, and ensure you stay focused. They can help you identify and draw on your own resources as well as learn others. Ultimately, this can enable you to make the right choices and decisions in a safe and supportive environment. The counseling process can help you feel more empowered and in control of your life by talking through situations, feelings, or concerns that might otherwise be keeping you feeling stuck, helpless, angry, or frustrated.

Myth: I've tried counseling before, and it doesn't work.

Reality: There are a number of reasons that may have led you to believe this, but as long as you are open to the counseling process, you can have a different and more positive experience this time around. On rare occasions, the fit between a person and a counselor might not be right, and that is one of the reasons why, when you contact your EAP, a full assessment of your needs will be completed from the very start.

Allcott, M. (Reviewed 2024 [Ed.]). Counseling isn't for me (B. Schuette & K. Smith, Eds.). Raleigh, NC: Workplace Options.

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