Benefits with The Local Choice

Effective Communication: Basic Skills

As a speaker, you sometimes focus exclusively on the information that you want to relay. However, your listener or reader may understand your message, understand only a portion of your message, or miss your point entirely—even though you transmitted the information accurately by your standard. It is not enough merely to deliver a message. The message must be received for communication to be successful.

Here are the steps involved in the send-receive model of communication:

• The sender sends a message.
• The receiver gets the message and personalizes it.
• The receiver, in turn, sends feedback and thus becomes a sender.
• The original sender now becomes a receiver and reacts to the feedback.
• Generally, a new communication sequence is then initiated.

In the send-receive model of communication, receiving or listening is as critical as sending the message because, without listening, it is impossible to personalize and respond to the message.

Listening Behaviors

When you focus only on yourself, you often forget to listen. As a result, the chances for successful communication are poor. Listening is the basis of effective communication and entails much more than just hearing sound.

Think about the last time you noticed someone obviously not paying attention when you were trying to communicate. What specific behaviors did the person exhibit that led you to believe that he or she was not attending to you? What impact did the person's behavior have on you? Perhaps you felt alarm that your important message was not getting through properly or frustrated that your audience was not getting it. You may have been offended by your listener's inattention or felt an urge to repeat your message.

Hearing Versus Listening

Hearing is the special sense by which noises and tones are received as stimuli. Hearing is a sensory experience that gathers sound waves indiscriminately. You can hear something without choosing to listen.

Listening is a voluntary activity. Listening includes more than just sound being received by the ear and transmitted to the brain. Listening includes interpreting or processing that sound. Active listening involves listening with empathy.

Active Listening

When you listen empathically, you don't just hear words. You hear thoughts, beliefs, and feelings. Empathic listening is highly active and requires hard work. Following these steps will help you to improve your listening skills:

1. The first step is to decide to listen and concentrate on the speaker.
2. Then, use your imagination and enter the speaker's situation. Concentrate and try to imagine his or her frame of reference and point of view.
3. Observe the speaker's vocal inflection, enthusiasm or lack of it, and style of delivery. These are essential components of the message. If you are speaking face-to-face, pay attention to the speaker's facial expressions and other nonverbal cues for more insight into the message.
4. Listen without interruption. Note key phrases or use word associations to remember the speaker's content.
5. Use paraphrasing or clarifying questions to confirm that you received the intended message. Check your perceptions of how the speaker is feeling to put the text of the message in emotional context.
6. Finally, provide feedback to the speaker.

Practice Active Listening

Like other skills, listening skills improve with practice. Ask a trusted friend to rate you honestly on your listening skills; then, the next time someone comes to you with a problem, work on the listening skills that need improvement. Practice empathic listening by attending, paraphrasing, and asking questions.

Tips for Active Listening

• Make eye contact. Eye contact increases the chances of getting the message and demonstrates interest and attention. When listening to someone on the phone, try not to look at things that will take attention away from the speaker.
• Adjust your body posture. Posture—facing the speaker and slightly leaning in—suggests that you are paying attention and helps you to stay tuned in. When on the phone, position yourself so that you're comfortable but not so relaxed that you lose the ability to attend to the speaker.
• Give verbal or nonverbal acknowledgment. Acknowledging the speaker helps involve you in the communication process and shows you are paying attention.
• Clear your mind. Clear your mind of your own thoughts to avoid wandering mentally.
• Avoid distracting behaviors. Distracting behaviors such as playing with a pencil, drumming your fingers, grimacing, jingling change in your pocket, or others may take away from your ability to listen and may distract the speaker.