Coping After Terrorism (Part 1)

This information is intended to help you understand reactions to an act of terrorism or mass violence. You may or may not experience these reactions. It is not intended to be a substitute for the role of professionals with expertise in counseling trauma victims.

Nothing in life can prepare you for the horror of an act of terrorism that robs you of your sense of security. No one expects such a thing to happen. Violent crime is an abnormal event, and terrorism is even rarer. The normal reactions to this type of traumatic disaster include a wide range of powerful feelings that may feel abnormal to the person having them or seem strange to people who have not gone through such a disaster. You may feel like something is wrong with you and that the terrible pain will never ease.

Recovering from a traumatic event will take a long time and will not be easy. Everyone responds differently to trauma. No one is reacting in a right or wrong way—just differently. It will help your recovery process if you don't expect too much of yourself and of others.

Reactions to a Traumatic Disaster

Shock and Numbness

At first you may be in a state of shock. Feeling numb and confused are common. You may feel detached—as if you are watching a movie or having a bad dream that will not end. This numbness protects you from feeling the full impact of what has happened all at once.

Intense Emotion

You may feel overpowered by sorrow and grief. As shock begins to wear off, it is not unusual to feel intense grief and cry uncontrollably. While some parts of society frown on emotional behavior, this emotional release is an important part of grieving for most people. It is unhealthy to hold back or "swallow" your painful feelings and can actually make the grief process last longer. A person who is uncomfortable with these feelings may want to seek help from a counselor, religious or spiritual leader, community leader, or other victims who understand what you are experiencing.

Fear

You may feel intense fear and startle easily, become extremely anxious when you leave your home or are alone, or experience waves of panic. You have been through a traumatic event. You had no time to prepare psychologically for such an incident, so you may feel intense anxiety and horror. You may be afraid that the terrorist(s) will return and harm you or your loved ones again. Crime shatters normal feelings of security and trust and the sense of being able to control events. Once you have been harmed by crime, it is natural to be afraid and suspicious of others. These feelings will go away or lessen over time.

Guilt

Victims who were harmed, physically or emotionally, in a traumatic disaster want to understand why the crime happened, and families wonder why their loved one was harmed. Some people find it easier to accept what happened if they can blame themselves in some way. This is a normal way of trying to once again feel a sense of control over their lives. Victims often feel guilt and regret for things they did or did not say or do and that they should have protected themselves or a loved one better or have done something to prevent an injury. Survivors spend a lot of time thinking, "If only I had . . ." This guilt does not make sense, because the circumstances leading to terrorism usually cannot be controlled and are hard to predict. Get rid of imagined guilt. You did the best you could at the time. If you are convinced that you made mistakes or have real guilt, consider professional or spiritual counseling. You will need to find a way to forgive yourself. Guilt feelings can be made worse by people who point out what they would have done differently in the same situation. People who say such things are usually trying to convince themselves that such a tragedy could never happen to them.

Anger and Resentment

It is natural for victims to be angry and outraged at the tragedy, the person or persons who caused the tragedy, or someone you believe could have prevented the crime. If a suspect is arrested, you might direct your anger toward that person. You may become angry with family members, friends, doctors, police, prosecutors, God, or even yourself and may resent well-meaning people who say hurtful things and do not understand what you—as a victim—are going through. Feelings of anger may be very intense, and the feelings may come and go. You may also daydream about revenge, which is normal and can be helpful in releasing rage and frustration.

Feelings of anger are a natural part of the recovery process. These feelings are not right or wrong; they are simply feelings. It is important to recognize the anger as real but to not use it as an excuse to abuse or hurt others. There are safe and healthy ways to express anger. Many people find that writing down their feelings, exercising, doing hard physical work, beating on a pillow, or crying or screaming in privacy helps them to release some of the anger.

Ignoring feelings of anger and resentment may cause physical problems such as headaches, stomach upset, and high blood pressure. Anger that goes on a long time may cover up other more painful feelings such as guilt, sadness, and depression.

Depression and Loneliness

Depression and loneliness are often a large part of trauma for victims. It may seem that these feelings will last forever. Trials are sometimes delayed for months and even years in our criminal justice system. The trial and any media coverage may result in having to relive the events surrounding the traumatic disaster. Feelings of depression and loneliness are even stronger when a victim feels that no one understands. This is the reason a support group for victims may be helpful; other victims will understand such feelings.

Victims of traumatic disaster may feel it is too painful to keep living and may think of suicide. If these thoughts continue, you must find help. Danger signals to watch for include (1) thinking about suicide often, (2) being alone too much, (3) not being able to talk to other people about what you are feeling, (4) sudden changes in weight, (5) continued trouble sleeping, and (6) using too much alcohol or other drugs (including prescription drugs).

Isolation

You may feel that you are different from everyone else and that others have abandoned you. Terrorism is an abnormal and unthinkable act, and people are horrified by it. Other people may care but still find it hard or uncomfortable to be around you. You are a reminder that terrorism can happen to anyone. They also cannot understand why you feel and act the way you do, because they have not gone through it.

Physical Symptoms of Distress

It is common to have headaches, fatigue, nausea, difficulty sleeping, loss of sexual feelings, and weight gain or loss during the experience of a traumatic event. Also, you may experience lower-back aches, chills or sweats, twitches or shakes, feeling uncoordinated, or grinding your teeth.

Panic

Feelings of panic are common and can be hard to cope with. You may feel like you are going crazy. Often, this feeling happens because traumatic disasters like terrorism seem unreal and incomprehensible. Your feelings may be so strong and overwhelming that they frighten you. It can help a great deal to talk with other victims who have had similar feelings and truly understand what these feelings are all about.

Inability to Resume Normal Activity

You may find that you are unable to function the way you did before the act of terrorism and to return to even the simplest activities. It may be hard to think and plan, life can seem flat and empty, and the things that used to be enjoyable now seem meaningless. You may not be able to laugh, and then when you finally do, you feel guilty. Tears come often and without warning. Mood swings, irritability, and dreams and flashbacks about the crime are common. These feelings may come for months after the disaster. Your friends and coworkers may not understand the length of time you will need to recover. They may simply think it is time for you to put the disaster behind you and get on with normal life. Trust your own feelings, and travel the hard road to recovery at your own pace.

Delayed Reaction

Some individuals experience no immediate reaction. They may be energized by a stressful situation and not react until weeks or months later. This type of delayed reaction is not unusual, and if you begin to have some of the feelings previously discussed, you should consider talking with a professional counselor.