Long-Distance Caregiving
It can be really tough to be away from a loved one who is ill, injured or has a disability that requires care. You may feel like you're a step behind in knowing what is happening with his or her care. Yet even if you live far away, it's possible for you to give support and be a problem-solver and care coordinator.
Caregivers who live more than an hour away from their loved ones most often rely on the telephone or email as their communication link. However, either of these methods can be rather limiting when trying to assess someone's needs. Aside from true medical emergencies, long-distance caregivers often need to judge whether situations can be dealt with over the phone or require an in-person visit.
Finding Contacts Near Your Loved One
Develop a relationship with one or two key members of the health care team, such as a social worker or patient educator. It may help you feel more at ease to have direct contact with someone involved in the medical care of your loved one. Also, many long-distance caregivers say that it helps to explore both paid and volunteer support. Ways you can do this are as follows:
- Create a list of people who live near your loved one whom you could call day or night in a crisis or just to check in.
- Look into volunteer visitors, adult day care centers or meal-delivery services in the area.
- Make a list of websites in your loved one's area to give you quick access to resources.
- Ask if the hospital keeps visitor information packets that list area agencies and contacts.
- Remember to share a list of home, work and cellphone numbers with the health care team. You should also give this to others who are local in case of an emergency.
Other Tips
- Ask a local family member or friend to update you daily by email or text, or consider creating a website to share news about your loved one's condition and needs. There are a number of sites available. Examples are Caring Bridge (Link opens in a new windowhttps://www.caringbridge.org) and Lotsa Helping Hands (Link opens in a new windowhttps://lotsahelpinghands.com).
- Sign up for online ways to connect with people. Programs using video and instant messaging to communicate are very common. For example, Skype and FaceTime are ways people connect from a distance.
- Airlines or bus lines may have special deals for patients or family members. The hospital social worker may also know of other resources, such as private pilots, advocacy organizations, or companies that help people with disabilities or illness and their families with transportation.
- If you are traveling to see your loved one, time your flights or drives so that you have time to rest when you return. Many long-distance caregivers say that they don't allow themselves enough time to rest after their visits.
- Consider getting a phone card from a discount store to cut down on long-distance bills, or review your long-distance and cellphone plans. See if you can make any changes that would reduce your bills.
U.S. National Institutes of Health (NIH), National Cancer Institute (NCI). (Updated 2020, August 6). Support for caregivers of cancer patients: Long-distance caregiving. Retrieved May 27, 2021, from https://www.cancer.gov