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Dads Are Different From Moms

Whatever approach you take to fatherhood, it's helpful to remember this: You don't have to be another mom. Your child has one of those already. What your child needs most is for you to be you.

Though you smell different, sound different, feel different and play differently than mom, you still have all the necessary tools for nurturing, rearing, and interacting with your child. In fact, these differences help in the balanced development of your child.

One essential way dads are different from moms is in the way they handle their children. This difference is evident from the very beginning of your child's life. Mothers tend to be more calm and quiet when picking up and holding their babies. Fathers tend to be more playful and active. The balance benefits the baby. As children grow older, moms tend to use toys more in playing and learning, while dads often are the playthings themselves. Dads, generally more eager to serve as jungle gyms than moms, engage their children in physical and sensory learning that way. Part of the reason you as a dad tend to be more inclined toward physical play is that your body wasn't nearly as involved as mom's for those first nine months, so you've got some catching up to do. This kind of play can help you establish the physical bond with your child that often comes more naturally to moms.

As your child grows older, differences may appear in the ways you and your wife or partner are affectionate with your child, your teaching styles, how you set limits, and how you respond to disciplinary situations. Studies have found that by giving kids more space to explore, dads encourage curiosity and help develop kids' confidence to solve problems on their own. Think about what you do differently from mom in these and other areas, and the benefits of those differences. It's always helpful to discuss the differences as well, both with your child and your spouse/partner.

Ultimately, as the dad, you will do many things differently from your child's mom. Remember that the differences are valuable, and worth appreciating.

Workplace Options. (Reviewed 2017). Dads are different from moms. Raleigh, NC: Author.

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