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Adjusting to Single Parenthood

Mothers and fathers that find themselves in the new role of being a single parent have many adjustments to make in their lives. It can often be overwhelming, but there are some things you can do to make the transition easier for both you and your children:

  • Give yourself time to adjust to your new role as a single parent and to grieve for the loss of your relationship with your partner. Your children will need time to adjust as well.
  • Do not consider yourself a failure because of a failed relationship. Focus on the positive things about you and your children.
  • Make a conscious effort to go forward with your life. Living in the past will not help you. You have to focus on the new life you and your children are now leading.
  • Set aside a specific amount of time each week to spend alone with each of your children. Talk openly about their feelings and give them your undivided attention during your time together.
  • Allow yourself to open your life to the people around you. You do not have to start dating or remarry, but be willing to allow your family and friends to help you through this transitional period.
  • Take the time to share your concerns with your children, and allow them to do the same with you. It is all right for them to know you are having financial difficulties or if you have met someone. They will be much more accepting of your honesty than if you hide the things that are going on in your life.
  • Seek out ways to enjoy any free time you have doing things that interest you that you may not have had the opportunity to pursue before.
  • Realize and understand that some of the responsibility lies with both you and your partner for the failure of your relationship. Recognizing your past mistakes will help you grow as a person and keep you from repeating them in any new relationships. Everything will get better. You have to believe that and reach out for the support you need during the harder times.

Workplace Options. (Revised 2023). Adjusting to single parenthood. Raleigh, NC: Author.

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